Saying NO to the Comparison Game

Do you ever feel like everyone around you has everything all figured out?

Like they are living fantastic lives full of health and happiness and success?

Do you ever think, what about me?

This has been showing up for me lately and I know I am not alone.  I know I am not alone.  I know that there are plenty of other people out there that do this too. 

It’s the worst.

Comparing yourself to others.

We look at one person who seemingly has it all and feel as though we could never be that thin/happy/peaceful/successful.  Or we look at someone else and we think, well at least I’m thinner/happier/more peaceful/more successful than that person.

The comparing game is so LAME.

It’s not helpful, it sucks away at your soul, and distracts you from showing up as your best self.

And it’s something that I am really good at.  I am really good at finding all the ways that someone else is better than me, more successful, in better shape…  I do it all the time and do you know how it leaves me feeling?  Shitty.

Yup, super shitty.

And unworthy.  And small.  And full to the brim with enough self doubt to keep me small for a lifetime.

Ugh.  This is my darkness.  This is something that I have made a commitment to exploring.  I am tired of being small.  I am ready to be big…  But to get there, I need to ditch this comparison game – or at lease, get curious about it. 

We are all striving to be the best we can be, right?  We are all at different places of our journey, we all have different back stories and lessons we have lived.  We can’t ever know the whole story of the person we are comparing ourselves too – we can’t know what they are thinking, what they have overcome, what they are in the process of overcoming… 

It just doesn’t make sense to continue to hold ourselves back from our greatness by comparing ourselves to others.

So…  Let’s.  Just.  Knock.  It.  Off.  Already.

How about we trade in doubt and uncertainty for faith in ourselves and some self-worth?  How about we begin today, and change this pattern that is not serving us AT ALL??

Awareness + Choice + Practice 

This is what it comes down to…  We need to start by catching ourselves playing the comparison  game.  Catching ourselves and calling ourselves out…

Hey look – here I am playing the comparison game and feeling really bad about myself…”

Get curious. 

Why is this person’s success drawing me into the comparison game?  What is it about her body/parenting/business that takes me there? 

Settle into your darkness.

What does my self-doubt and unworthiness feel like?  What sensations does it bring to my body?  What other emotions and stories are present? 

Choose to a different path.

Move your body around until you are grounded and in a posture that allows you room for possibility. Room for greatness.

Release your self doubt and breathe in the quality you do wantThis may be determination, focus, compassion (for self and others), love…

Tell a new story.  Create an affirmation, a mantra – anything that leads you in the direction of worthiness and possibility.

Here are some of mine:

My body is strong and I have all that I need to continue down the path of good health…

My children feel loved and encouraged…  I am a great mama.

I know how to find peace in my body and embrace challenges as opportunities to grow.

My business is a success, I make a difference in the lives of others.

Now – cover your world with these affirmations!!

Post-its on the mirror or in your car, alarms set on your phone, a special bracelet or piece of jewelry that sends you back to these truths.

We can only create a new way of being when we are in the practice of going there!!  You can do it!  I can do it!!

This world will be a much better place to live when we all quit allowing our external experience determine our internal experience… 

How does this land for you?  Please head down to the comments and let me know what affirmations you will start to tell yourself when you notice you are playing the comparison game.  Let’s support each other!!

Smiles,  Casey