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You can listen to What Fresh Hell on your IOS device, Android or through the website
My guest today is Tosha Schore, M.A. Tosha brings a burst of energy and optimism to parenting, and will lift your parenting confidence! She is an expert at simple solutions to what feel like overwhelmingly complicated problems.
A sought after coach, author and speaker, Tosha is committed to creating a more peaceful world, one sweet boy at a time. Through her online and in-person offerings, she supports parents to care for themselves, connect with their boys deeply, set limits lovingly, and play wildly.
Tosha is a trainer of Hand in Hand Parenting and co-author with the organization's founder, Patty Wipfler, of "Listen: Five Simple Tools to Meet Your Everyday Challenges." She is also creator of the wildly popular "Parenting Boys Peacefully! A FREE 10-Day Reconnect," and the new online course, "Out With Aggression!"
Raising boys in these days of toxic masculinity
Taking a hard look at the ways that men are conditioned
Creating a more peaceful world, one sweet boy at a time
The question of how to help our boys grow into emotionally intelligent men who don’t see women as objects is worldwide
How to help our boys grow up to be peaceful – Huff Post article
Move beyond the anger and the fear to what we can DO
Opportunity shows up in raising our boys
We need to teach our boys that there are lots of ways to be close that aren’t sexual
It’s ok to talk, cuddle, hold hands – lots of ways of being intimate
Documentary of The Mask You Live In
Not giving permission to boys for having intimate friendships with other boys
Navigating the jockeying for power among boys
Redefining what it means to be masculine
What is being modeled in the homes for our boys?
Increase our own emotional intelligence and pay attention to how we navigate and model our own upset
Boys being encouraged to stuff their emotions
Not comfortable with allowing our boys the time and space to have feelings
Help them feel comfortable with their full array of emotions – not just anger
Popular culture isn’t helpful
Advocate/ Fight for the right of our boys to have feelings
AND advocate for them to make mistakes and learn from them
When our boys make mistakes we need to help them
Talk about music lyrics and porn and do it when they are YOUNG
Amy Lang – parent educator, parenting through our children’s sexual development
Start talking to your boys
Don’t let your discomfort get in the way of letting our boys be their whole selves
Amy’s short video about having convos about sexual harassment/assault with our kids
Talking to our kids about standing up to friends who are harassing others
Seize opportunities for modeling/showing them what it looks like to “do what’s right”
Story of masculinity inside of supporting a woman on Reddit
Acknowledging that standing up for what is right is challenging!!
Teachable moments are when they make mistakes and getting into mischief
Final thoughts – “hurt people hurt people” – boys and men are hurting and therefore hurting others… when we help them heal from their hurts, we are solving the problem
Where to find Tosha:
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