Eps 103: Solo Show Digging Under the Surface of Bedtime Challenges

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Who needs sleep? If you think about your best parenting moments vs. your more challenging ones I think we could venture to say that sleep OR lack of sleep would be a BIG contender.  We have all been there. We move fluidly through that familiar bedtime routine, finish that last Llama Llama page, kisses, lights out….. We are no further from the kitchen when we hear “Mooooooooooom”!!! or Daaaaaaadddddeeeeeeeeeeee”! Sigh.

Mama Christine posted this week about her daughter’s sleep struggles “oh, tribe, apologies for the long post, but I'm in dire need of some help. bedtime. dear lord, my daughter is 5, and it. is. brutal. her bedroom is on the first floor, mine is upstairs. she's often hungry before bedtime, so we usually do a snack like high fat yogurt and fruit. after bedtime jobs are done, i read to her, we sing, and say our goodnights...generally 20ish minutes. nearly every night, she's out of bed for any number of 'reasons': need to say goodnight to the dog, still hungry, thirsty, needs to say something to me, needs to ask me a question, needs another hug, says she can't sleep (within minutes of me leaving her bedroom) and the list goes on”. 

Christine is not alone here, otherwise there would not be a book called Go the F@ck to Sleep . Let’s break this struggle down, so Christine can get some sleep and her little one can feel peaceful slumber.

What you will hear:

·      Iceberg view – top of the iceberg; requests, getting our of bed, one last… Under the surface; belonging and significance, influence, connection

·      Mischief showing up when we have misguided ideas about belonging and significance

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·      Getting curious, noticing lack of skills to complete task (ie going to sleep)

·      Getting curious so we can be solution minded, see where child has influence

·      Children long for connection, they settle for attention

·      Creating routines that help kids know what is happening and allowing them to have influence

·      Making agreements to help kids create boundaries

·      What is my child’s perspective?

·      Asking how am I feeding this problem?

Link to Deborah MacNamara

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Coaching with Casey

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Eps 53: Rebecca Michi Breaks Down Sleep

My guest today is Rebecca Michi, a children’s sleep consultant and mother of two daughters. In her work with families over the years, Rebecca found that sleep issues were a common problem. This realization led her to specialize on the subject and offer coaching help to many parents. I’m thrilled to get her insights into this issue—and( let’s be truthful), haven’t we all had some pull-our-hair-out moments? Whether you’re a brand new parent or the parent of teens, Rebecca has great tips to share. Join us!

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • Temperaments and sleep patterns are unique to each person.

  • Rebecca’s average client is 8 months old!

  • Most children need help falling asleep and STAYING asleep.

  • Her philosophy? Support parents in their parenting style

  • Unique family dynamics

  • Sleep: Why it’s a very basic need

  • Sleeping “through the night” is usually defined as 5 consecutive hours AFTER midnight.

  • “Good sleeper” or “bad sleeper”

  • At bedtime, focus on relaxation and physically slowing down.

  • Other bedtime routines can be singing songs, reading books, and quiet play.

  • Negotiables and non-negotiables about bedtime

  • Giving children SOME choices gives them healthy empowerment.

  • Teens’ sleep patterns change (but they STILL need 8-9 hours!)

  • Limit evening electronics and bright lights (use incandescent bulbs)

  • Rebecca shares the guidelines for number of sleep hours needed, from ages 0-3 months to 13 years.

  • It’s normal to wake 2-6 times each night.

  • The goal for your child? The ability to get themselves back to sleep when waking

  • Don’t make sleep or the bedroom a means of punishment!

  • What does Joyful Courage mean to you? “It means going forward on your parenting journey, even when it’s unknown, and trying to enjoy it! Look at it in a positive way.”

Resources:

www.childrenssleepconsultant.com

Find Rebecca on Facebook, too!

The No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley

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Brain Informed Parenting - A Webinar
This week for Wednesday Webinar (7.27.16), I will share some basic brain science that you don't need to be a genius to understand. When we have a basic understanding of our kids brain development, and our own, it can shift the way we interact with our kids, deepening our relationships and keeping us focused on teaching skills. You DO NOT want to miss this hour!

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Alanna McGinn tells us all about how to make SLEEP happen...

This conversation landed close to my heart...  While my kids are now sleeping in their OWNbeds, in their OWN rooms, ALL NIGHT LONG, that was not always the case.

And while my nighttime parenting choices weren't always the same as everyone else, they didn't follow the mainstream advice,  I did the best I could for my babies... 

The thing I really love about Alanna and her approach to supporting parents with sleep, is her willingness to meet parents where they're at.  She really believes in the idea that there is a right approach for each family, and that it is going to be related to what works in each family...

As any parent knows, there is no one size fits all here...  AND it is possible to help your child, and yourself, get better sleep.

Listen in!

Where to find Alanna - 

www.goodnightsleepsite.com
www.facebook.com/goodnightsleepsite
www.twitter.com/GNSleepSite
http://pinterest.com/gnsleepsite
 

Join the Live and Love with Joyful Courage Community here.

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