Eps 179: SOLO show about trusting relationship and encouragement

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Casey is on solo with you today digging into what it means to trust the process in the context of parenting, Positive Discipline, and leaning on our relationship as the most powerful way to influence our kids behavior.

What does this mean?

-       Hitting stage
-       Homework stage

The relationships/ life skill development journey 

When we are stuck in a place with our kids it is easy to believe that it will “always be like this”

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-       Change happens over time

-       If we want something to be different we have to BE different

  • The dance we do with our kids has explicit steps, well choreographed over time

  • All it take is one person to change the dance (YOU)

What it means to be in an honest open relationship with your children

-       What can feel like the dark side

-       Curiosity and stalling when you don’t know what to do

-       Notice your fear and let it guide you to pausing

-       Gather your resources

-       Listen to your gut

 

How to voice concerns without blaming or condemning (thermometer activity)

-       Encouraging vs discouraging out kids

  • When they are discouraged by OUR behavior they shift OUT OF taking responsibility or even thinking about their own behavior

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 Authentic Parenting Conference

Anna Seewald, host of the Authentic Parenting Podcast, and parent coach, has put together a steller day of learning and growing together in New Brunswick, NJ. I am so excited about it that I decided that I WANTED TO GO TOO!!

I am going to be there, Dr. Laura Markham will be delivering a keynote (ah-maze-ing), and the whole thing just looks like super soul care on fire.

 If you are interested, click here https://authenticparenting.com/conference and use the discount code JOYFUL25 for $25 off the registration fee!!

Come play with me!!

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Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access tot eh tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

Presale is April 10th – as many of you as possible buying presale would be FABULOUS. I am going to have some special bonuses TBD for my presale buyers.

Official launch date is May 20th – OMG – so so exciting!!!

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you and we are ALMOST THERE!!!!

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Buy the Parenting Teen Audio Summit!
** This will only remain available for a limited time **

The Parenting Teens With Positive Discipline Audio Summit is a deep dive into the messiness of parenting through the teen years and beyond. Each of the featured guests speaks candidly from both their wisdom as parent educators, as well as their real life experience of raising their own teens.

Check it out – www.joyfulcourage.com/teensummit

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Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Eps 155: SOLO SHOW! Casey is on Deep Diving into Intuition

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SOLO SHOW – woohoo

Let’s talk about intuition today…. Well, I am going to J

·      Connecting dots with Eps 154 Dan Siegel interview

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·      The ability to sift through the experience you’re having and everything that is calling inside of you – and create space to show up as our best selves

·      We all have an inner knowing, inner voice – where we can tap into deep wisdom

·      Making sense of our spiritual experience

·      Finding intuition while navigating my parenting

·      How conditioning supports/gets in the way

·      How do we tease apart intuition from fear/conditioning/doubt

·      “What if the first hit is true?”

·      “What if our stories and experiences are offered to us to develop our intuition?”

·      Growing our “hub of awareness” requires practice

·      PRACTICE MATTERS

·      Becoming an outside observer takes practice

·      We move towards what is familiar

·      Sacred Contracts Caroline Myss

·      Trust

·      What happens when we choose in to the practice of developing space for our intuition?

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Mother’s Journey  Home to Herself
Overland Park, KS

Many of us become mothers and we get caught tending needs of our family, or homes and our community, and struggle to find ways to move our personal growth and wellbeing up the priority list. This weekend retreat will allow you the opportunity to explore self-care rituals that will help you reset and feel renewed, and give you nurturing tools you can incorporate into your daily life far beyond our time together – so that you can feel more ease, peace, connection and joy in the every day.

A Mother’s Journey Home to Herself is an invitation for deep personal inquiry, while practicing tools for deepening relationship with ourselves and our family, resulting in more cooperation and ease and joy during this exceptionally time of our lives.

EARLY BIRD PRICE THROUGH the end of August!

Find out more and register now à http://www.joyfulcourage.com/mjweekend/

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Become a Joyful Courage PATRON!

You can now find Joyful Courage at http://www.patreon.com/joyfulcourage and make a contribution to the show that you love! This is a opportunity for you to sign up to make a monthly financial commitment and support the sustainability of the podcast.

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Living Joyful Courage MEMBERSHIP PROGRAM

I would love LOVE to have you in the membership. It’s some good learning and community – EXACTLY what you need to transform the climate of your home.

Check it out à www.joyfulcourage.com/living-jc

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All the goods at www.joyfulcourage.com/yes

Intention Bracelets

Back by popular demand!! The Joyful Courage intention bracelets are back in stock and I am THRILLED to have been able to have had the community vote on the reminders that are on them…. Breathe, Pause, Trust, Surrender, Kindness – what do you need?

DAILY INTENTION CARDS

What do you think about the Daily Intention Cards???  These cards are designed to support you in your conscious, intentional parenting practice.

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Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Eps 131: How to use routines to shift the dynamics in your home

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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A solo show all about routines

There are a couple tools, that when put into place, make the whole parenting journey easier.  You have heard me talk about special time, that one on one time that is so important for building relationship and a solid foundation of belonging and significance for our kids.

Challenges coming up in the LLWJC group

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  • mornings, bedtimes, defiance, meltdowns, sibling issues

    • We find ourselves putting out fires

    • We find ourselves being overtaxed

    • We find ourselves slipping OUT of who we want to be and INTO crazy parent

    • This is also where we loose sight of the way that we are contributing to the chaos at hand….

      • We blame out kids

      • We fall into the trap of “it is always so difficult”

      • We forget that there is always a flow that comes after the ebb….

Yes, special time helps with the challenges mentioned about.

The relationship we nurture with our kids is what has the biggest impact on their behavior, absolutely.

AND, another tool that is super helpful to come back to, again and again, is co-creating routines.

Now, if you are someone with challenges in the morning, or after school, you may be thinking, but we have a routine, and it isn’t working!!!

GREAT.

Not all routines are created equal.

  • Routines are made to be modified and changed up

  • Routines designed to be HELPFUL for everyone will be the most USEFUL

Mindset matters

  • This is not about getting your kids to do what you want them to do

  • This is about helping your children feel like capable, contributing members of the family

  • This is about the process, the opportunity that exists inside the challenge that is currently at the surface

Take a deeper look…

  • Co creating routines means that you are CO CREATING

  • Find a time of day when everyone is feeling good, connected

  • Opening up the conversation to child about how they experience the challenging time of day, validate their feelings, listen and let them know you are taking their sharing to heart – this is not time to talk them out of what they are experiencing or getting them to “see your side”

  • Clear out the space through taking accountability for your behavior. This is really important.

  • Ask for their help to make that time of day easier/better for everyone

  • Brainstorm ideas/tasks

  • Offer/counter offer if you need to

  • Be open to their ideas

  • Be firm/not rigid around your non-negotiables

    • “This is what is important to me, how could we make that work?”

    • “What is your idea for that?”

  • Cross off anything that isn’t related/reasonable/respectful/helpful on the list

  • Work together to create a visual reminder

  • Try it for a week

But, but, but what if it doesn’t “work”

  • Shifting to what is “helpful”

  • Focus on the process

  • TRUST the process

  • Let the routine be the boss

  • Revisit at the end of the week and tweak if necessary

So many routines….

  • Housework

  • Family Meetings

  • Mornings

  • Afterschool

  • Bedtime

Take it slow – let go of urgency

How you show up matters

Be in your practice of curiosity and openness – catch yourself when you want to judge  (roshambo/coin flip) Currently in a new routine of turning screens off from 5-7.  This is a slippery place for us….

Recently posted a handout on the live and love page – will put it in the show notes – for walking through this process. Let me know if you have any questions!

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Chaos to Calm

New offer from Casey!!

This is a four part video training that will support you in transforming the climate of your home.  More information at http://www.joyfulcourage.com/chaos

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All the goods at www.joyfulcourage.com/yes

Intention Bracelets

Back by popular demand!! The Joyful Courage intention bracelets are back in stock and I am THRILLED to have been able to have had the community vote on the reminders that are on them…. Breathe, Pause, Trust, Surrender, Kindness – what do you need?? 

Joyful Courage SHIRTS

Women cut tanks and tees are ready for you to BUY NOW!!  Wearable reminders for how you want to show up in the world.

DAILY INTENTION CARDS

What do you think about the Daily Intention Cards???  These cards are designed to support you in your conscious, intentional parenting practice.

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Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

Eps 127: A solo show about WHY our job is to hold space for our kids and HOW to do it

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Holding space for having a 15 YEAR OLD!!  WHOA!!

What is happening in the BIZ

  • Membership is HAPPENING

  • Alumni group calls

  • Ecourses

  • Coaching calls

    • What is happening in the collective is happening in the individual

    • I speak to the community and I am speaking to myself

    • TRUST – BIG PICTURE – MARATHON NOT A SPRINT

How to “hold the container”

  • Jessica talking about “our job is to be the container”

  • Present, available, confident – even as our kids are making mistakes

  • I got you – I am unconditional

Our response matters

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  • Who we be comes before what we do

    • We can handle it

    • Everything will be ok, or not, either way, we stand by our kids

    • We trust that they can handle what life gives them, and we support them inside of that (the world’s consequences, etc)

  • What to do becomes more clear when we practice being in the moment, vs in our emo/fear

    • Learn how to recognize we are there when we are there

    • Practice being with our overwhelm without letting it takes us over (observers)

      • Simple but not easy!!! Takes time!!

    • What we are trying to do is REWIRE the brain (Tina Bryson show 126)

    • Be witness to the presence of the emotional freight train, but let it idle

      • My book!!! Next Fall!!! WOOHOO

Our kids make mistakes

  • Lagging skills/ impulse/ brain development – DON’T BE SURPRISED BY IT

  • Cause and effect

  • Pushing boundaries to know where they are and who YOU are in the process

    • Making judgements about themselves and their peeps

      • Trust? Safety? Dependability? Can they handle this???

BUT WHAT DO WE DO???

  • Alfie Kohn, Unconditional Parenting – “I am not going to sit here and pretend that I have all the answers to all of your problems. I don’t know you or your families…”

  • What are the outcomes that you want? What are the skills that you are hoping that your adult child will one day embody?

    • What are the skills your child is showing you (through behavior) that they are missing?

    • What is a solution to the challenge that will help them learn those skills?

    • Is there something to “make right”?

    • How can you say less and listen more???

    • Remember – finding solutions to problems, including a “plan for next time” or a “plan to fix the mistake/make things right,” finding solutions are always consequences – HOWEVER consequences that we impose on our children are NOT always a solution to problems.

      • WHAT DO WE DO often is a request for “what do we do to them?”

Kids do better when they feel better. – Jane Nelsen

Kids want to succeed, they don't always know how. – Ross Greene

A Misbehaving child is a discouraged child. – Rudolf Dreikurs

Humans are always moving towards a sense of belonging and significance, am I connected? Do I matter? – from Aderian Theory

The most powerful tool you have for influencing behavior is the relationship that you nurture with your child. Choosing into the work of Joyful Courage, which really means being willing to grow and practice awareness, being present to your child and your experience, and hold space for your kids, no matter how they are showing up, THIS will nurture and preserve relationship.

So – what do you think? Does this make sense to you?? Do you have thoughts about this?

Come join the community discussion over in Live and Love with Joyful Courage. This is a closed FB group for listeners and parents that appreciate this conversation and are committed to learning and supporting each other on the journey.

Thank you so much for listening today – super DUPER appreciate all you moms and dads out there doing the work of making the world a better place through showing up well for your children!!

I will be back next week with Liz Blackwell-Moore talking about teens and drugs – GAH!!!  I know – it’s scary, but listen anyways because she is brilliant and the conversation is helpful!!

Big love!!

Eps 80: Rachel Macy Stafford encourages us to choose Only Love Today

Today’s guest is Rachel Macy Stafford, founder of Handsfree Mama, best selling author and special education teacher. We are discussing letting go of distractions so you can focus on what really matters. Join us!

“There is no space for perfection in parenting and living boldly. I want to live bravely, boldly, flawed and full of hope.”

What you’ll hear in this episode: 

  • Parenting and opportunities to choose to be mindful

  • Avoiding getting caught up in the moment as a practice

  • Making a “presence” pledge to yourself

  • Surrendering and learning to let go of control and expectations of mastery or of a certain outcome

  • Raising future adults and allowing space for practice

  • Self-care and the importance of “do nothing” moments

  • The value of physical self-care

Resources:

Only Love Today – pre-order until March 7

Where to find Rachel:

Website l Facebook l Twitter

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FEED 3,000

LET'S FEED SOME PEOPLE!!

I would love to invite you to join me in making 3,000 snack sacks over the next three months and take them to organizations that serve the hungry!!

Not one of us can make all those lunches ourselves - BUT ALL OF US TOGETHER SURE CAN!!

So here is the plan, host a gathering at your house and invite other families over. Have each family bring some supplies and together make as many snack sacks as you can!!

Click here for the Feed 3,000 Facebook Event Link

Click her to go donate to the Feeding America page.

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ParentMap is proud to present Dr. Laura Kastner for Tame the Tears: Parenting Positively on Tuesday, Feb. 28 at The Brockey Conference Center in West Seattle. Learn skills to help encourage positive behavior, manage those dreaded tantrums (yours and theirs!), teach emotional intelligence and strengthen the needed bond between child and parent.

Tickets on sale now.

https://www.parentmap.com/article/beat-the-tears-parenting-positively

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Join the Joyful CourageTribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on iTunes to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast on iTunes to help me spread the show to an ever larger audience!!

Eps 57: Sharon Ballantine Talks Teens and Their Need to Pull Away

Join the Joyful CourageTribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Today’s guest is Sharon Ballantine! With 3 children to parent, she turned to books for help with parenting, but she never had the time to read and process the information in the books. So, with no other options available to her, she decided to rely on her own intuition and her own Internal Guidance System for parenting. She began using this technique and the law of attraction to manifest exactly what she wanted as a parent. In this episode, Sharon shares exactly how she made it all happen! Join us!

Sharon Ballantine is a Parenting and Life Coach and Founder of the Ballantine Parenting Institute. Her book, The Art of Blissful Parenting, guides parents with practical as well as spiritual advice in raising their children. It also guides parents on how to get into alignment, discover and use their own IGS before they can teach their children.

In this episode Sharon also discusses:

  • How to find answers within yourself

  • You have an internal guidance system that begins with your feelings

  • Why leaving the room can help you get “in alignment” to parent

  • Physical movement can be a tool to help bring you into a centered place of alignment

  • Changing the subject that is causing stress and bad energy can cause a shift in energy

  • The teenage years are the years of “personal discovery”

  • Parents spend the teen years in fear mode and resort to using control

  • Whoever a teenager is today is not their final destination. Be patient; they will change.

  • Why we want to avoid making our children feel bad at all costs

  • Staying centered will give you the coping skills to deal with any kind of crazy you have to deal with

  • “This too shall pass” - it is true especially for teens

  • Ways to deal with teen behavior that is harmful

  • Focusing on the future and consequences of actions can allow a teen to take responsibility and look at the big picture

  • How to support your child’s development of their Internal Guidance System

  • Ways her failures as a parent contributed to finding her Internal Guidance System

  • What joyful courage means to her and how it contributes to bliss

Resources Mentioned on the Show:

 The Secret - Rhonda Byrne

The Art of Blissful Parenting - Sharon Ballantine

Connect with Sharon:

Website - sharonballantine.com

 Facebook/sharonballantine

Twitter/LifeCoachSB

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The Intentional Parent Project
Interested? I would love for you to join me on this 10 week journey. Click here for more information.

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Join the Joyful CourageTribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

::::::::::

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on iTunes to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast on iTunes to help me spread the show to an ever larger audience!!