Do you ever feel like you are totally in the zone? As if everything has magically fallen into place and you just feel good? That is how I am feeling these days and I like it. As a parent, wife and professional, I am feeling empowered and grateful. I am feeling a sense of ease and calm that often times feels out of my reach.
So what gives?
When I think about what is different now that is feeding into this feeling of calm, I immediately reflect on the effort I am putting into self-care. There is a reason the flight attendant tells us to put on our oxygen masks before we put one on our children – we have to take care of ourselves so that we are able to take care of others. It’s just a fact of life. And I am doing my work.
Fear, shame and self-doubt can be left at the door. No thank you, not needed, no room in my life for these things. When we are crippled by these three little daemons, we are not able to show up in our life. We are not able to be our true authentic selves. And if we can’t show up in our own lives, then we are unavailable to show up for our families.
Love, self worth and acceptance please come to the main stage. This is what I have replaced that space with. The fear has been released, and I am now showing up believing in myself and all of the gifts that I bring to the world. Truly. Game changer. I'm a better mother, a better wife, a better parent educator.
But this takes work. Its easy to write these words, even to say them out loud, but to live in a reality of worthiness and wholeness requires a conscious effort. For example, I am beginning to embrace the mistakes I make, rather than allow them to chip away and my confidence. That’s right, no one is expecting me to be perfect, so why the hell should I think that is how I should be???
Like just now I thought to myself, “Do I just keep writing the same post over and over using different words?” Self doubt creeping in… “Are people getting tired of reading this same message?” Perhaps I’m not worthy enough to be putting myself out there… “What if someone calls me out???” FEAR moving into panic….
No thanks! Not interested. I know that what I am writing about is important to the world because it is important to ME and changing the way that MY LIFE FEELS. So there. Screw you daemons.
And, yes, in case you’re wondering, this may be the theme of my posts for a while because this is the work that is making a HUMONGOUS difference in my life and, well, that’s pretty much what my blog is all about, my life, so there you go.
I have mentioned before that I am on a serious Brene Brown kick. I was listening to a podcast interview with her this morning and she was talking about parenting. She said something that really resonated with me. She said, how our kids turn out in the end is more about how we show up in the world, and how we show up for them, and less about what we know about parenting.
This makes me think about the parents that are showing up to my parent class. Right now, I am honored to be leading 43 people (whoa) on their journeys in understanding and embodying Positive Discipline. They show up each week with their own stories – challenges and successes with their kids, reflections on their own childhoods, support for each other.
They show up.
They show up determined to strengthen their relationships with their kids.
They show up willing to look inside and reflect on their own beliefs and behaviors.
They show up.
And this is what makes all the difference! Its not magic It’s rocket science. Its simply that moment when you decide to continue to move forward. Its when you are ready to replace the daemons. It’s the effort you make to DO YOUR WORK.
And doing my own work is changing my world.
What is your work?