Eps 123: Solo Show - Navigating Big Emotions From Grownups and Kids


Context – we all have the power and the skills to be the parent we want to be 

A recent post from the Live and Love with Joyful Courage community:

Can we talk about sharing our big feelings with our kids?

My kids are 2.5 and 4.5yo, and I don't know how to share my big feelings in front of them without freaking them out. I want to be able to be my full and authentic self with them, in an age appropriate way. And I realize, the fact that they are upset when I am upset means that they are afraid of my big feelings and may be afraid of their own big feelings. We try to welcome their big feelings (tantrums, disappointment, etc.) but I think we do a miserable job at it.

Compounding this, I am someone with explosive emotions. I tend to feel things very deeply and it takes me time to calm down. I have worked hard to make sure I don't express those emotions in a negative or scary way. But instead I most often bottle them up, which isn't good either.

Celebrating awareness. Celebrating emotional intelligence. Celebrating authenticity. Celebrating personal responsibility.

Misconceptions (in general):

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  • not ok for our children to see us upset
  • not ok for our children to FEEL upset
    • they’re being naughty
    • they’re manipulating
    • they’re learning “bad behavior”
  • welcoming big feelings is the same as condoning hurtful behavior

This is a POWERFUL example of what I think is the PURPOSE of parenting:

  • to grow into our best selves

Children are mirrors

  • not mimics
  • instead, provide a reflection of how we effect the world, what our impact is, what we are inviting

Children/parenting journey is an invitation

  • recognizing conditioning
  • recognizing what our “driver” is
  • recognize commitment vs attachment
    • Committed to being a connected parent vs attachment to what that looks like (slippery, perfectionism, comparison) 

Children/parenting journey is unrelenting

  • The lessons come every day, moment to moment
  • The growth is like peeling an onion
  • There is no where to ARRIVE

Child/parenting journey is an opportunity to grow

  • I can’t say this enough
  • Where are your hard edges?
  • Where is there room for self growth?
  • Where can flexibility show up inside of rigidity
    • “I am someone with explosive emotions.”
    • We are ALWAYS evolving
      • What can we learn about ourselves?
      • What can we practice that will be more helpful and less hurtful?
      • How can we deliver our experiences and be heard?
      • How can we create a PRACTICE that honors us and our experience while also models the life skills we want our children to one day embody?
        • Practices are UNIQUE and INDIVIDUAL
        • The myth of “balance”
        • Assumptions about our “roles”

Taking care of ourselves and our own self-regulation, in the end, will do more to teach our children and influence their behavior than any tool you can find in a book or the internet.

You’ve got this!


Intention Bracelets

Back by popular demand!! The Joyful Courage intention bracelets are back in stock and I am THRILLED to have been able to have had the community vote on the reminders that are on them…. Breathe, Pause, Trust, Surrender, Kindness – what do you need?. Find them at http://www.joyfulcourage.com/mantra-bracelets/

Joyful Courage SHIRTS!!

Women cut tanks and tees are ready for you to BUY NOW!!  Wearable reminders for how you want to show up in the world.

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What do you think about the Daily Intention Cards???  These cards are designed to support you in your conscious, intentional parenting practice.

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On my journey of strengthening my awareness and practicing conscious parenting, LJC is the support and inspiration I NEED to put the knowledge and tools I have to work in real life, every single day. I am deeply grateful for this group of incredible women and for Casey.  - Mama Lauren

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