Eps 99: Casey is Solo Exploring Boundaries, Agreements and Screen Time

Welcome back to the show!

Let me share my own story from the trenches… You aren’t the only one who has kids who act like you are ruining their lives when you ask them to help our around the house…  AND, it is a beautiful thing when your kids turn it around and own their behavior, right? It is a good thing, yes, but I am getting curious about if I am inadvertently raising a people pleaser….?? 

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A question from the community

Mama Denise shares “Literally losing my mind on first day of summer vacation over iPads. I don't have an ounce of energy for a single tool. I'm the worst mom ever, according to my daughter (5y 10mos). And my 7 1/2 yo son "needs this mower" on a farm simulator game. Literally feel like pitching these machines in the dumpster. Thank you for listening.”

These are the struggles where we can release most of the load and pull our kids into co-creation. Casey takes Denise’s familiar scenario and leads us through the practice of intention, presence and solution.

  • Showing up intentionally, rather than reactively
  • Creating intention and applying it to our lens and presence
  • Noticing the ease of intention when the ride is smooth and the rockiness when things fall apart
  • Creating routines that help kids know what is happening and allowing them to have influence
  • Making agreements to help kids create boundaries
  • Identifying needs vs. privileges. ex. Screen time – it is a privilege
  • Privilege comes after contributions
  • Difference between contribution vs. chores
  • A privilege differs from a reward
  • It’s not about “earning”, it’s about “management”
  • Guiding kids to have a voice in solutions when they feel an agreement or routine is not working
  • Seeing the tip of the iceberg and KNOW that beneath the surface is a request for boundaries
  • Allowing children a voice means we hold them as contributors to the cause
  • Children are more likely to follow through when they have a voice in the creation of the agreement
  • Introducing offer and counter offer tool – teaches parent how to let go of agenda, control and rigidity
  • Sharing power when stakes are low

Resources:

Routine Handout
Agreement Handout

Stay Tuned:

Coming up is our 100th Episode!!! I am so pleased and honored to have Tina Payne Bryson PhD, co-author of the Whole Brained Child, on our 100th Episode. 100 y’all! Can you believe it!? Tell your friends, co-workers and neighbors. Remember to subscribe for instant access to new podcasts and automatic access to scrumptious listening from pasts guests!

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Young Living Essential Oil

Today you heard me talk about how helpful Thieves Essential Oil was in keeping my family healthy.  If you are interested in finding out more about Young Living Essential Oils, feel free to email me at casey@joyfulcourage.com OR go to http://bit.ly/caseyyloils - I am happy to support you!

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Coaching with Casey

Are you playing with the idea of one on one coaching? I currently have a few spots available in my schedule and would LOVE to work with you.

Coaching with Casey is a three month commitment. We will explore your vision for parenting and even bigger, how you want to show up for your life. We explore mindset, and how shifts in mindset create big shifts in relationship. And finally, we deep dive into the tools and strategies of Positive Discipline for teaching, modeling and practicing life skills.

Coaching is an investment. If you would like to find out more, and explore the possibility that coaching is a good fit for you, schedule a 20 minute explore call.  Click here and we will schedule our call!

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